Nobody knows the shape I'm in.

I'm doing laundry and listening to Joy Division. It's been quite a day.

I used to have a dog, but when I ventured out into the world, she got pawned off onto my sister. This was okay, though, because she's had a better life living with my sister and her family. She developed a tumour in her brain about a year ago, which caused painful seizures that required her to always be under heavy medication.

Today, my sister finally resorted to euthanasia.

And this is how I know that I am not grown up yet. My sister, as hard as a decision as this was to make, knew what she had to do for the betterment of our beloved pet. This is not a decision I could make; this is how I know that my sister is an adult now and that I am still just an adolescent.

Amongst things like dead dogs and impending homelessness, I am now also discovering that only animals like geese will stay with their mate for the entirety of their lifetime, and this is breaking my heart. On some sort of utopian, sun-licked beach in the back room of my Starbucks mind, penguins can stay together for much longer than just a season.